Don't Shoot the Mod RAF (Game over)

[ralphmerridew]

RAF can take a while to play out. Why wait that long? Why not try a shortcut?

Alternative move: Instead of shooting self, another player, or air, you may instead try to shoot the mod and preemptively declare yourself the winner.

1: If more than one player attempts to shoot the mod in a round, they get into an argument and kill each other.
2: If only one player tries to shoot the mod in a round, and somebody else shoots him, the first player dies normally.
3: If only one player tries to shoot the mod in a round, and nobody else tries to shoot him, then he wins.

I'm considering an alternate set of rules:
1: If, in a round, more than one player attempts to shoot the mod and is not targeted, they all end up killing each other.
2: If, in a round, only one player tries to shoot the mod and is not target that round, that player wins.

Suppose there are three players. Alice and Bob shoot the mod; Charles shoots Bob. Under the first ruleset, Alice and Bob kill each other immediately; Charles puts a second bullet into dead Bob and wins. Under the second, Charles kills Bob, and only Alice shoots the mod (and wins).

Deadline for signups is 48 hours. Also, please mention if you have any opinions about which ruleset to use.

1) Undercover Monk (dead round 2)
2) raekuul
3) Zag (dead round 1)
4) MNOWAX (dead round 1)
5) Chuck (dead round 1)

[Undercover Monk]

/in for ruleset #1
_________________
The Classic Blunders:
1. never get involved in a land war in Asia
2.Never go in against a Sicilian when DEATH is on the line
3. Never release Peyton Manning

[raekuul]

[Zag]

I'm in. But, just to let everyone know, I'm going to shoot the mod in the first round, so nobody else do it.

[MNOWAX]

[Chuck]

I'll play, and I might as well also shoot the mod. That way I can win if Zag changes his mind. If Zag does shoot the mod and I don't then he'll win, so I'll lose whether or not I shoot the mod so I have nothing to lose by shooting the mod.

[ralphmerridew]

In order to win by shooting the mod:
- You must be the only one to shoot the mod that round.
- You must survive the round.

[ralphmerridew]

Not many signups .

Send your move within 72 hours.

[MatthewV]

Ooops, I am late.

[ralphmerridew]

Time's getting short, and I haven't gotten all the entries.
I didn't mention this in the rules, but if I fail to get an entry, I will treat it as if that person targeted air, then kill him/her at the end of the round.

[ralphmerridew]

Time for submissions is up!

"... same rules as always and I'll return in ten minutes after you've finished this round." finished ralphmerridew as he withdrew.

But Chuck wasn't going to play by the same rules. rm would be alone in the lounge. Chuck could steal the RAF medallion from him and be gone before anybody notice. He lit off to prepare his ambush.

Zag finished building his mirrored chamber. It was so precisely designed that a laser beam could reflect 10^853 times before hitting Zag in the heart. But it was very delicate; the slightest flaw would cause it to break and allow the laser beam to escape. Zag carefully aimed his weapon and turned on the power.

[ralphmerridew]

Chuck carefully lay in wait for ralphmerridew to exit the lounge.

Waiting ...

Waiting ...

---

All the delays were making Undercover Monk antsy. "What's taking him soooo looooongg?" He drew his pistol and was about to fire, when he realized he was short on bullets. He holstered it and instead started firing off his Nerf gun at random.

---

The first Nerf bullet landed a short distance from Zag's mirror. The second bounced off the door to the lounge. The Nerf crossbow bolt ended up blowing back into UM's face.

---

... waiting ...

Chuck remained patiently outside the lounge. rm would emerge eventually, and Chuck would be ready when that happened. Not even the Nerf bullet landing on him would disturb his composure.

... waiting ...

Didn't rm say it would be just 10 minutes?

... waiting ...

(The Nerf arrow did start to get to him.)

... waiting ...

---

MNOWAX nervously entered the lounge. The nerf javelin to the back didn't help his disposition any. "I know I was a bit late with sending in my move..."

"Tough. You were late. You're out."

"I was only half an hour ..."

"You were still late."

"But I ..."

"No buts. You were late."

"YOU HYPOCRITE! IF YOU DON'T LET ME SUBMIT, I'LL SHOOT MYSELF HERE AND NOW!"

"Well, you were going to end up do..."

BANG! MNOWAX's head splattered itself across the room.

"Yick. How do I clean that up?"

---

... w . a . i . t . i . n . g ...

---

Finally, inside, ralphmerridew reached for the doorknob. Chuck watched the door pull open a crack; he carefully trained his sights where ralphmerridew's head would be in a few seconds...

And BANG! One exploded head later, everything was greatly simplified. A simple plan, executed nearly perfectly.

With that "nearly" being raekuul shooting Chuck shortly before he could plug rm.

---

Meanwhile, with nothing having disturbed Zag's mirror, the laser drilled a very clean hole directly though his heart.

******

Zag: Sitting inside my perfectly mirrored chamber, I fire my laser pistol. I have calculated that, in 10^853 reflections, the laser will strike me in the heart. I trust that someone shooting at me will cause an imperfection in the perfect mirror, thereby deflecting my laser into that person.

Undercover Monk: I will go crazy with anticipation and start shooting the air with a virtual amory of Nerf weaponry.

Chuck: I'll shoot the mod.

raekuul: I shoot Chuck.

MNOWAX: shoot myself in the head (late)

Zag, Chuck, and MNOWAX are dead.


Sorry this took so long to post, but it was tough work cleaning up that lounge. Have you ever had to get brain tissue out of carpet? It's not easy!

[ralphmerridew]

Deadline for survivors to send moves is four days.

[ralphmerridew]

ralphmerridew slumbered peacefully. After all, it's hard not to do that after a good mug of coke and chloral hydrate. So he was completely unperturbed by UM carting around knives, locks, drills, blowtorches, and even something that looked like a bear trap.

"What can I make rm do to himself? Maybe I can have force feed him the key and he has to cut open his stomach to get it?" he wondered aloud as he clamped ralphmerridew into the leg irons. "Or --- I've got it!"

Reinvigorated by his idea, UM eagerly resumed work. He picked up the drill from the table, put three holes through one arm of rm's chair, then put the drill aside. He wrapped the chain through those holes and clasped the lock on it, securing rm.

...

After positioning the crossbow, UM stepped aside to practice his speech. "It's very simple. All you have to do is repeat the words before enough sand has leaked into the bucket to pull the trigger, and I'll let you go. Otherwise .... Now just say it. "It's okay for people to call me mmmpphh."

His closing words were actually fairly well enunciated, considering that raekuul was forcing dirty sock into his mouth at the time.

It wasn't that long before ralphmerridew woke up just as raekuul finished removing the traps.

"That's the second time you've saved me! Congratulations on your victory; you earned it!" as he placed the medallion around raekuul's neck.

-----

Undercover Monk: I will attempt to kill the mod by putting him in a Jigsaw trap. Happy Halloween!

raekuul: Hmm... Undercover Monk seems most likely to attack you next, so I'll attack him with a dirty sock.

raekuul wins! (Now get back to Boring RAF!)

[raekuul]

...I won?

I won! Yay!

Er, I hope this isn't permanent...

And yeah, Boring RAF really does need to get moving.

[Undercover Monk]

See I figured you would know that I knew that you would think I would do that so I would kill myself to kill you. So I killed the mod. Very Logical.
_________________
The Classic Blunders:
1. never get involved in a land war in Asia
2.Never go in against a Sicilian when DEATH is on the line
3. Never release Peyton Manning