Four or Less RAF -- It's over!

[mathgrant]

I apologize for abandoning that other Ready, Aim, Fire game I'm modding. Maybe modding this game will encourage me to get back to that other one eventually, though.

This game will be played by standard RAF rules; the twist is that only words of at most four letters in length are allowed. (The sole exception is this first post in the thread, which is allowed to have words which are as long as I please, for the sake of clarity.) For example, you can use Pong, a fig leaf, or a one-eyed Jack as a weapon, but not Mario, Adam's ribs, or one-eyed Jacks, since Mario, Adam's, and Jacks are all longer than four letters. (Hyphens, like that in "one-eyed", are considered to be word breaks.)

If your screen name has a word that is more than four letters in length, please provide a preferred nickname which doesn't violate this rule (like mg). This way, people can refer to you more easily when writing your deathscene or shooting you. For instance:

I, AKA mg, wish to play this game.

(Yes, I'm playing. Just trust me that I'll choose my targets and weapons before looking at anyone else's. )

Official rules regarding deadlines (possibly boring and tl;dr territory, but I feel like I should get this out of the way right now):
The deadline for each round is four days or less fewer (natch), starting when I PM all of the players to alert them that a new round has started. If you fail to send by then, you will die by the mod, and the other players, knowing that you have failed to send and are out of the game, will be given four days to change their own targets if they wish to do so. (However, I can't change my choice, since I'm both playing and modding, and thus already know everyone else's choices.) Anyone firing at a player who was modkilled will automatically have their shot redirected at the air if they fail to either confirm or change their choices within the second period of four days; all other players' choices will remain the same unless they choose to change them.

The ones who will play:
mg
mv
Lex
rm
Ford
WAX
grz
Zag
Pois
Mac
Chuk
The Monk
PKTA
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[mv*]

I can play. Sign me up as mv.

[lexprod]

Lex will play

[ralphmerridew]

Shouldn't that be "Four days or fewer"?

u!/

I'm "rm".

[Dented Ford]

I want to play as well. I am Ford.

[MNOWAX]

WAX want to PLAY!
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The Man The Myth The Legend
MNOWAX

[mathgrant]

[groza528]

Fine, I'll play. I'm not a huge RAF fan, but I'll give it a go. You can call me grz.

[Zag]

[mathgrant]

[Poisonium]

I will give it a shot. Not the best game of all time, but it's not bad. You can call me Pois, even if I don't like that nick (and I must say, I don't).
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[marcusI]

If it's not too late, I'd like to try. You can call me Mac.

[Chuck]

Oh, all rite, I'll play. Chuk is as good a name as any.

[Undercover Monk]

UM will play and win. It will be easy. Lets GO
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2.Never go in against a Sicilian when DEATH is on the line
3. Never release Peyton Manning

[MNOWAX]

Wait you dont want to be the Monk?
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MNOWAX

[raekuul]

PKTA will join in this epic game of low word size

[mathgrant]

PKTA, your YT page has a Let's Play of some game I don't know with a nail. I love a good Let's Play. I will be sure to see it!

I have a Let's Play or two on my page, as well. Want to see me drop pill upon pill on top of many a germ? Look here!
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[Undercover Monk]

[raekuul]

'tis more fun than a try to be The Guy, so much I here will and can say.

[mathgrant]

I deem it to be a good idea to play our game now.

Send for turn one!
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[grz*]

For how many more do we wait?

[mathgrant]

My list says that only one, Pois, has yet to send. And it's been four days, has it not?

But Pois said that he'll "be gone next week" in a Maf sign-up post. That was five days ago, the day ere I PMed him (and the rest) to send for turn one. So what to do? Kill him and move on? Wait for him to come back?
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[MatthewV]

Have him look at the sky.

[marcusI]

Are we to vote? I ,mac, vote to give pois a week. Yes, the rule says no, but he did warn them he was to be out. Just not us.

[mathgrant]

I'll give Pois one week. No more, no less. Then we move on, even if he does not send.
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[ralphmerridew]

I say "No, do not give Pois one week!" If Pois did not send in time, too bad for him. I have seen too many an RAF game slow to a stop over one man who did not play. You said "Four or less" at the top, and I will hold you to that!

I will say that for sure: If this game will slow for one who is away, then rm is out!

[DF*]

Once all have sent - with Pois or not - I feel this may bode ill for a mod who does not give news of our mini war in good time!

(Keep up the pace, mg!)

[Zag]

I agre... conc... am with them! Four or less is the rule! Be true to it.

[DF*]

I did not say that I wish to move on with Pois not in as a part of this any more. I only fear that mg must look out if he is late with mod text in this game! The cast all seem in a rush, and ire will boil over if you are late, mg!

For my part, if Pois is gone for a week from 16th, then I feel we can wait a day or two, yet I fear his post says that he will be gone for this full week, and only come back on 28th. If so, my vote is to move on.
It may be that by the time the mod has done the text, Pois will be back and have sent his shot. If that is in time for the mod to work it into the text, then Pois may yet be in luck even if we left him out.

[mathgrant]

F**k you, Pois! No more Mr. Nice Mod! You are dead to me -- and to this game! (If you say this is not fair, I say that next time you are in a game of RAF, tell us -- and not just a Maf mod -- that you will be gone. Then, if you ask me in a nice way, I'll let you send a wee bit late.)

If any one of the rest opts to redo his or her aim now that Pois is dead by the mod, do so now. With no more ado, I will pen the RAF game tale and tell you all who will live and who will die.
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[Poisonium]

*suicides gloriously*

Sorry about it. I wasn't actually gone, that was a calendar miscalculation on my part. Real-life has been a bit busy, though. Well, I can't recall too well, but I seem to have failed to show up here.

But please make it a great suicide.
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I tried apt-get install lifebut it only returned E: Couldn't find package life

[MatthewV]

sigh.

[The Monk*]

SIGH X2

[Poisonium]

sigh x3
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I tried apt-get install lifebut it only returned E: Couldn't find package life

[MNOWAX]

X4 im too sighed to actually sigh...
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MNOWAX

[ralphmerridew]

Sigh. Will mg be able to post the day on time, or will he not? I'd open a book, but it'd be anti law for me to do so. So, if you have the feel that he will, post that you do so! If not, post that you are anti. But if you do not make the true post, when he says that he can't, or does make the post, you must post that you have egg on your face.

I post that he will post day.

[mathgrant]

Turn One, Part One

PKTA and mg sat on a sofa (a sofa is a very nice and soft seat for one's tush, you see), and had a talk, just the two of them. “I like rock!” PKTA said. “That one band from the UK that used to have Pete Best in it is the best band of all time! They even have a Rock Band game now!”

“What band do you mean?” mg said, not very keen on rock.

PKTA took a pen and used it to ink the name of the band on his hand. mg read it. “Oh, that band! I get it!” mg said with a nod. “That band is good, not like that one trio of bros whom all the teen gals are in love with.”

“Oh no,” PKTA said with fear. “You don't mean the one in that 'Camp Rock' film, do you?”

“Heck yeah, I do,” mg told him.

“Ewww! I want to hurl! They suck very much. They who even dare hear a song by that lame band are just daft. Daft, I say! Daft!”

“Hey, I like Daft Punk!” mg said. “Work it. . . make it. . . do it. . .”

“Shut up, you fool!” PKTA said. “I did not say the word 'punk' at any time in that line.”

“I have a fun idea!” mg said. “You play a song by John, Paul, and, um, the two guys, and at the same time, I will play a song by Nick, Joe, and Kev. The air will die from the rock plus the suck!”

“That will be fun!” PKTA said. “Hmmm. What song will I play? 'Hey Jude' is a good one. Or I can use 'Can't Buy Me Love', or 'All You Need is Love', or 'Love Me Do'. . . dang, they sure do like love a lot.”

“Just pick one!” mg said, as he used the net to find a list of each song by Nick, Joe, and Kev. “Darn it! If only that song were 'Love Bug', and not just one word. Oh, well. I'll use it.”

“Why that one?”

“I just like it. It's a neat song.”

“. . . um, are you daft?”

“Did I say that out loud? Oops.”

“Aha! 'Let it Be'! I've got to use that one!”

And so PKTA (the cool one) and mg (the daft and dumb one) both hit “play” at the same time. The air did not know what to do (rock out, or gag), so it just died.

“Hey, PKTA!” rm said. “What are you up to?”

“Not much. I have my butt on a sofa, and the air is dead. Life is good.”

“Oh, good, I see you are not at all busy. I take it you have time for me to read you a book, then!”

“No! Not a book!” PKTA ran, but rm took hold of him to stop him. “I beg of you not to read me a book!”

“Oh, but it's a very good book! It's 'The Old Man and the Sea'! In this book, an old guy from Cuba can't reel in a long fish! Isn't that a fun tale to hear over and over?”

“Nooo! Too. . . much. . . TEXT! I hate text! I find it a huge bore!” With a kick to rm's. . . “man area”, PKTA got free from rm's hand, and ran off to try to find some way to not have to hear a lot of text. “I'll say hi to Zag,” PKTA said. “Heck, I'll toss this CD with 'Let it Be' on it at him! Then I can say bye to him, as well!” PKTA made it, via car, to the home of Zag. “What the CRAP?” said PKTA when he got to that spot. “Zag has not ever had a wall here in the past. Why does he opt to have a wall next to his home now? Does he have an evil plan that uses that wall? He is the type of guy who's apt to make an evil plan. . .” PKTA knew of the risk, but took a gulp and said, “I'll go with my plan, and try to kill Zag.” He hit his fist on Zag's shut door.

“Who is it?” Zag said. “If it's a lady to try to get me to buy Avon crap that I don't need, go away. For the last time this week, go the heck away!”

“I'm no lady!” PKTA said. “I'm a man!”

“A man to sell me Avon crap? That is new. Come on in.” Zag let the door open. He saw PKTA with a CD in his hand. “Wait a sec. . . that isn't crap sold by Avon! It's the song 'Let it Be'! That isn't even crap! I've been had!”

“Um, okay.” PKTA spun his eyes. “You are more than a mite odd on this day, but meh. I'm here to kill you, not to tell you how odd you are.”

“Kill me? That won't work!” Zag said. “Look at what my wall can do when I clap!” Zag did so, and his wall took off into the air, and then was in a fall. “Soon, you will die! Look up at that wall, and be in awe!”

“Oh, no!” PKTA said. “By what I see, that wall will land on me and kill me!”

“Yep! So long, pal!”

The huge wall hit PKTA on the head; it made him feel a pang of pain, and soon he was dead. “Gwa ha ha!” Zag said. “I am an evil. . . um. . . evil guy!”

mg: I will take aim at the air with a song by "rock" (or so they say) sibs Nick, Joe, and Kev.
Zag: Zag has a huge wall made. He is safe from hits from any man. Bad news, tho, if wall is not hit -- it will fall on him. [aim at self]
PKTA: I fire rock at Zag.
rm: rm will read "The Old Man and the Sea" to PKTA, just 'cuz his name is not like his name.
PKTA dies.
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[Zag]

PKTA, you ruined my streak. I've actually survived a first round of a game of RAF. Chillblains for the devil tonight!

[raekuul]

I will not do that from now on. This post fits the rule of four or less as of now. This edit by PKTA.

[ralphmerridew]

PKTA and Zag did not obey the rule!

(Also, why did PKTA call PKTA "PKTA"? Not that it will do him any good to say why, as he is dead, but I'd be glad to know why.)