Alphabet Stories Reloaded

[The Doctor]

To revive more OT Games, here is the Alphabet stories thread again. In this thread, we will creat 26 line stories, each successive line beginning with the next letter of the aphabet (or would you like 27, ending on the letter you started on?).

I'll begin with T:

There was once a large piece of bratwurst.

[This message has been edited by The Doctor (edited 07-30-2003 12:41 AM).]

[Courk]

Unfortunately, it was eaten by someone more evil and vile than the Easter Bunny.

[The Ktulu]

Venom was in the bratwurst, however.

[Beartalon]

"Why did you poison my sausage?" screamed the butcher.

[The Ktulu]

"You slept with my daughter!" came the reply.

[Beartalon]

"Zounds! Poisoned sausage for playing hide the weenie!"

(posts like this make me realize it's time to go to sleep)

[transvestite with boobs]

X-ophobic scoundrels forgot my favourite letter!

[The Ktulu]

"AHHHHHHHHHHHH, two letters were switched!" the poisoned bratwurst said in horror.

[Hitchhiker]

Bratwurst is not known for its intelligence.

[Courk]

'Cause it was dropped on its head as a baby.

[MatthewV]

"Drain Bamage? I don't have drain bamage!" screamed the poor thing.

[Kd]

'Exactly my point.' said the butcher.

[Kd]

(Forgot to mention - the butcher is Yoda. )

[ooc] One way to make up for my lack of grammar, eh? ^_^ [/ooc]

[Cadmium]

"Geez", thought the bratwurst, "You may have a point, but I have two!"

------------------
Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia - Fear of long words.

[The Ktulu]

"Have two points, do you?" Yoda said.

[Orbiting]

"I do indeed, sir. Had you not noticed?", replied the offended bratwurst.

[One Skunk Todd]

"Just move along, nothing to see here" said the bobbie with the large truncheon to the gathering crowd.

[This message has been edited by One Skunk Todd (edited 07-30-2003 10:26 AM).]

[dethwing]

"Kindly remove me from the bun", squeaked the Bratwurst.

[The Ktulu]

"Lie patiently there, you must, before removed, you may be," the butcher Yoda said.

[This message has been edited by The Ktulu (edited 07-30-2003 01:24 PM).]

[KingPin]

MMMMMM that naked Bratwurst looks good!!

[This message has been edited by KingPin (edited 07-30-2003 12:32 PM).]

[Orbiting]

"Naked Bratwurst!" cried the bobbie, "This is an affront to common decency - hide your eyes!"

[The Ktulu]

Only a naked bratwurst could kill a venomed-sausage, and that's what it did.

[HyToFry]

Put some cuffs... and clothes... on that bratworst ordered the cheif of police.

[KingPin]

Quality! Judging by the size of that Bratwurst's sausage, it's more about quality than quantity!

[The Ktulu]

"Rights, I want my rights!" the Bratwurst demanded.

[KingPin]

"So you want your rights?" The Bobbie replied "I'll read you your damned rights!"

[HyToFry]

That's all folks.

[The Doctor]

Story 2: By Charlotte Brontë

Emily, Lord Barinshay's ward, thought of many things, most poignantly the bright sunlight illuminating every portion of the garden, the limpid pool of blue water, the dahlias, the roses, and Master Edward's wagon.



[This message has been edited by The Doctor (edited 07-30-2003 05:38 PM).]

[KingPin]

Fire engine red, the wagon was painted. Now that wagon has rusted as she has aged, and the memories of her childhood in this garden are just that, memories.

[Vinny]

(ooc: I just realized where the sn KingPin comes from. I saw Daredevil last week =] )

[Orbiting]

"Garden," she sighed, "Oh faithful garden, how can you continue to bloom and grow when my Edward is so far away? Why do you not wither and die, as my heart has withered and died in the absence of my love, my secret love?"

{ed. note - the first version of this post also contained references to fertilizer}

[This message has been edited by Orbiting (edited 07-30-2003 05:58 PM).]

[The Doctor]

Haunted by such thoughts, Emily noticed not the footsteps so lightly tread and coming in her direction. The sun continued to shine, now resting on the red pomegranates.

[Jack Crazyquilt]

"Ill, indeed, would it be to see either garden or love wither in the midst of so much fertilizer," spoke a strong, assured voice behind her. Emily felt what little blood was in her face drain away as she whirled about to face the man who had intruded so forcefully into her innermost feelings--surely that voice could belong to none but her lost love, Edward! Instead, she found herself facing a hideous little dwarf, his skin ghastly pale even in the warm afternoon sunlight.

Emily drew back in horror. "Your voice sounded so tall, dark, and handsome!" she finally managed to gasp out in a disappointed tone. The horrid little manikin grinned wickedly and hefted the bag he bore upon his shrunken shoulders.

"With enough manure, a small voice can sound mighty, no? With enough manure, even one such as I might sow their seed in a withered garden--or a withered love."

Hearing such vulgarities, Emily's face grew whiter still, even though that was physically impossible. "Please, please," she said faintly, gathering her flagging courage, "in the name of common decency, can't you just call it fertilizer?"

"Are you kidding me?" said the dwarf. "It's taken me ten years of practice to get into the habit of calling it manure!"

[Hitchhiker]

[not part of game]This isn't going to make it as a "26-line story," is it?[/npog]

[The Doctor]

"Jenkins!" Emily cried out, in the hopes that her man might remove the ruffian. But a cruel smile played over the dwarf's face.

"'Tis Jenkins's night off, nay, my dear?"

A look of terror came over Emily's blanched face. "How did you know that?"

He cackled horribly. "I know many things!" he taunted.

[KingPin]

[notpartofgame]

Originally posted by Vinny:

---

(ooc: I just realized where the sn KingPin comes from. I saw Daredevil last week =] )

---

I am an original. I don't need no stinkin movie to come up with a sn![\npog]

[Beartalon]

Knives flashed in Emily's hands, dropping from their hiding places in the sleeves of her dress. "These you probably didn't know about!" she screamed as she expertly threw them across the room, one into each of the dwarven pupils.

[casinopete]

Little did Emily know that the dwarf was a time-traveling cyborg pirate, and his S-24 Tungsten-Carbide Eyeshields had withstood far greater force than mere throwing knives - but though the knives failed to blind him, the force of her passion for life and overwhelming beauty did not.

('Talon started it) fnord.

[robichelli]

Many things she then hurled at the "Time Travelling Cybort Pirate" including sticks and stones (which didn't break his bones) and pomegrantes (but he just ate the seeds).

[Beartalon]

"Never start a fight you can't finish, dear," growled the dwarf.