John Ratite's Custodia Islands Getaway [Qaqaq declared champ

[mole]

3. He'd be... an interpreter?

Sounds more likely than my second thought - camel salesman - since camels aren't exactly a service.

This is my punishment for sleeping, I guess. I knew the answer to number 2.

[T McAy]

Tahnan answers question 1 with "Pilates." John Ratite replies that the answer is correct. The crowd applauds.

Qaqaq answers question 2 with "Aces and eights." John Ratite replies that the answer is correct. The crowd applauds.

mole answers question 3 with "Interpreter." John Ratite replies that the answer is correct. The crowd applauds.

Endgame: Round 7

John Ratite presents the following three questions for the seventh round of the Endgame.

1. What computer gaming term describes an ultimate "cheat sheet" of instructions that tells a player how to complete an adventure game, step by step, from start to finish?

2. In his famous 1815 "Letter from Jamaica," what political revolutionary wrote, "Do not adopt the best system of government, but the one that is most likely to succeed"?

3. What type of dental specialist would be best suited to perform a root-canal treatment?

mole: 1 strike
Qaqaq: 0 strikes
Tahnan: 2 strikes

[mole]

1. A walkthrough

[Qaqaq]

I don't love my guesses for the two remaining ones (thanks for taking the one I know, mole...), but I hate my guess for #3 less than my guess for #2.

3. periodontist

[mole]

I'm considering it a birthday present.

[Tahnan]

That's ironic, Qaqaq, because I hate your guess for #3 even more than I hate my guess for #2. Which is 2. Thomas Paine.

[Qaqaq]

Hmm, I think I hate your guess for 2 even more than what mine would have been (Toussaint-L'ouverture). Both are wrong, as I'm sure you now know. Au revoir.

And happy birthday, mole! I hope my first strike helps brighten your special day.

Edited to add: Hey, roots go below the gum line, it wasn't *that* sucky a guess.

[This message has been edited by Qaqaq (edited 07-25-2003 01:21 PM).]

[Tahnan]

Alas, alas. At least I got to meet Mr. Ratite in the flesh. And perhaps my prize for coming in third will be not getting a copy of the home game--it would be cool to have the trivia in a home game, admittedly, but I really don't need the clown that comes with each copy.

[T McAy]

mole answers question 3 with "Walkthrough." John Ratite replies that the answer is correct. The crowd applauds.

Tahnan answers question 2 with "Thomas Paine." John Ratite blinks and replies that the correct answer is "Simon Bolivar. Tahnan receives his third strike and is now out of the endgame." Tahnan shakes the hands of the other two finalists and steps down from his drum. The audience applauds this third place visitor.

Qaqaq answers question 3 with "Periodontist." John Ratite pauses and replies that the correct answer is "Endodontist. Qaqaq receives one strike." The crowd coos in sympathy.

Endgame: Round 8

John Ratite presents the following two questions for the eighth round of the Endgame.

1. What 1951 film, based on a C. S. Forester novel, was the inspiration for the Jungle Cruise attraction in the Adventureland section of the Disneyland theme park?

2. Who was the famous caretaker of a tailless, gray kitten named "All Ball," which was the gift of a psychologist named Francine Patterson?

mole: 1 strike
Qaqaq: 1 strike

[This message has been edited by T McAy (edited 07-25-2003 02:25 PM).]

[Qaqaq]

I'll guess 2. Schroedinger

[mole]

And I'll guess 1. Tarzan

[Tahnan]

Man, where were these questions when I needed them?

[T McAy]

mole answers question 1 with "Tarzan." John Ratite takes a beat and replies that the correct answer is "The African Queen. Mole receives a second strike." The crowd speculates noisily.

Qaqaq answers question 2 with "Schroedinger." John Ratite exhales and replies that the correct answer is "Koko the gorilla. Qaqaq receives a second strike." The crowd stands in excitement.

Endgame: Round 9

John Ratite presents the following two questions for the ninth round of the Endgame.

1. The acronym EBITDA that appears in corporate statements of financial performance refers to the company’s "earnings before" the calculations of four factors that affect total assets. Name three of these four factors.

2. What mythological weapon is properly known as Mjollnir?

mole: 2 strikes
Qaqaq: 2 strikes

[Qaqaq]

2. Thor's hammer

[Qaqaq]

And *wow*, did I wake up at the right time today!

[mole]

Interest, Taxes... umm... I know there is a term starting with D... I've just forgotten what it is.

My nuclear waste won't help in this situation, will it?

[T McAy]

Sorry, nuclear waste won't help here.

Do you want to think some more and repost your answer, mole? You have about 46 hours until the deadline.

[mole]

I'll guess Interest, Tax, Depreciation?? then.

[Werebear]

*doesn't know whether to cough or not*

[T McAy]

mole answers question 1 with "Interest, taxes and depreciation." John Ratite replies that the answer is correct, and that the fourth answer would be "amortization". The crowd applauds.

Qaqaq answers question 2 with "Thor’s hammer." John Ratite replies that the answer is correct. The crowd applauds.

Endgame: Round 10

John Ratite presents the following two questions for the tenth round of the Endgame.

1. What ship, captained by Juan Sebastian del Cano, was the only member of Ferdinand Magellan’s fleet to completely circumnavigate the globe in the 16th century?

2. What word that appears on the notation of western music is a direction for a violinist to return to using the bow after a pizzicato segment?

mole: 2 strikes
Qaqaq: 2 strikes



[This message has been edited by T McAy (edited 07-30-2003 10:09 AM).]

[Qaqaq]

2. arco

[Werebear]

The Battle of Hastings! 1842! A Playpus! Arcturan Megadonkeys! Babe Ruth!

[mole]

Whew, I knew nothing about that one.

1. Victoria is the only one I can remember. I think it's the one you're after though...

[T McAy]

mole answers question 1 with "Victoria." John Ratite replies that the answer is correct. The crowd applauds.

Qaqaq answers question 2 with "Arco." John Ratite replies that the answer is correct. The crowd applauds.

Endgame: Round 11

John Ratite presents the following two questions for the eleventh round of the Endgame.

1. If a native Maori wielding an uhi chisel asked if you would be interested in a "moko," what would he be offering to give you?

2. Name three of the four supermodels who jointly own the "Fashion Café" chain of restaurants.

mole: 2 strikes
Qaqaq: 2 strikes

[Werebear]

I'd be dead right here.

[Qaqaq]

I think I *may* know the supermodels, but I'm going to bet that Mole doesn't. Since the chisel thing seems to only have a few possibilities, it seems more guessable, therefore I'll grab it, and if we both miss, well, no biggie.

1. a tattoo

[Hitchhiker]

I'm enjoying Werebear's commentary as much as anything else

[Werebear]

I'm restraining myself so I won't get kicked out of the peanut gallery.

[Tahnan]

Heh. I was out driving today, thinking about the supermodel thing, and I said to myself, "I bet Qaqaq knows--but I bet he'll bet that mole doesn't." Maybe I'm ready for a copy of the home game after all.

[mole]

If he thinks I don't know, he'd be right...

[mole]

I hear only good things about Elle MacPherson though.

[mole]

Three, right. Need to read the question.

Along with fellow Aussie Elle Macpherson, Claudia Schiffer, Kate Moss

And this is probably the end.

[mole]

Oh, three of them? That's what I get for not reading the question...

Claudia Schiffer

Kate Moss

And this is probably the end.

[Dragon Phoenix]

It is...

[mole]

For whom? I'll assume it's me.

-steps down from the drum-

Well done!

[Dragon Phoenix]

Don't know about your competitor - yours is wrong (I googled out of interest)..

[Werebear]

Well, at least you'll have a copy of the home game, mole... you can beat yourself over the head with it for hours. *laugh* I would have guessed Applegate or Locklear... you did get 2 of them.... good show, mole.

[T McAy]

Qaqaq answers question 2 with "Tattoo." John Ratite replies that the answer is correct. The crowd applauds.

mole answers question 2 with "Elle MacPherson, Claudia Schiffer and Kate Moss." John Ratite pauses dramatically and replies that the "Elle MacPherson and Claudia Schiffer are correct but that the other possible answers are Naomi Campbell and Christy Turlington. mole receives his third strike and receives a hearty round of applause for contributing to such an exciting endgame. mole and Qaqaq shake hands and then mole steps down from the drum.

Even after mole steps down, it takes a moment for Qaqaq to register that he is the only visitor left. John Ratite rises and gestures a feathered staff (that looks a bit like a plumber’s helper) toward the center of the clearing and declares, "Qaqaq is the John Ratite’s Custodia Islands Getaway Champion!" The native women ululate joyfully, the male dancers blow the conch shells and the members of the audience leaps to their feet in thunderous ovation.

Streamers and confetti rain down over the clearing as Qaqaq is bedecked with floral garlands and jewelry symbolizing the victory. Qaqaq is escorted to the grandstand where John Ratite is standing. John makes some semblance of ceremonial blessing, and then shakes Qaqaq’s hand in a more traditional mainland gesture of congratulation. The celebrating in the clearing dies down as audience members anticipate John Ratite about to speak.

"Well, done, Qaqaq" John Ratite begins. "This has been a long journey, and I would imagine that you are at the point where you could probably use a vacation from your vacation. I do have a few trifles to reward you for your determination."

Several of the islanders carry some small gift baskets to the grandstand area. John Ratite collects the baskets and presents them to Qaqaq. "As champion of the Custodia Islands Getaway," he says, "you will receive a number of fine skin care products, all of which contain emu oil." The audience members ooh and aah and then break into polite applause.

John Ratite then produces a slip of paper from the inside pocket of his robe. "You will also receive this gift certificate good at the any of the Grey Labyrinth travel bureaus. If your participation in a future Mafia game or Diplomacy thread requires extended travel, you may redeem this certificate for a seat class upgrade, DirecTV access, or an extra Grandma’s oatmeal raisin cookie with standard meal service." The members of the audience again clap respectfully.

John Ratite then turns to the throng of islanders and visitors in the audience. "There is one more prize I have to present, but before I do that I have some explanatory remarks to make to the entire group. As some of you may recall from the first post," John begins, "this getaway was an introductory offer intended as a promotion for the Custodia Islands resort. Throughout the getaway I have had the time to do some soul searching and attend some meetings with my accounting staff. I came to the conclusion that the island chain has essentially achieved its maximum potential as a trivia game resort, so I’m afraid that the first Custodia Islands Getaway is also the last."

Some members of the audience groan. Others whisper or look at one another in silent curiosity. "Now that announcement leads me to a few additional points," John continues. "First of all, I am still in the puzzle resort development business and have a number of projects in the planning stage. Travel packages for new John Ratite vacation destinations with trivia-enhanced landscapes may be made available in the Grey Labyrinth forums in the near future."

"Also, there have been rumors of some labyrinth-style trivia games designed by other Grey Labyrinth members that will be launched in the forums soon. I’m looking forward to seeing what some of the bright minds of Grey Labyrinth come up with." Eyes widen throughout the audience, and the visitors and islanders applaud.

"Designing trivia game resorts is challenging task, though it is not as difficult as some people believe it to be. It is important to figure out little tricks that get the job done. For example, I was having trouble financing a new resort I am working on. Then my accountants told me that I would be eligible for certain loan programs if I could take advantage of a certain tax break. The tax break in question would go into effect by my giving away a sizeable piece of real estate as a prize on a game show. Therefore, it is my privilege to inform you, Qaqaq, that you are now the owner of the Custodia Islands and are free to enjoy them however you please. My fleet of seaplanes is at your disposal to fly you and your friends to the islands anytime. While there will be no trivia content, you may still enjoy the beaches, trails, hotels, museums, aviary, library, mountain resorts, ferries and, of course, the frou frou cocktails. The Islands staff will remain here to tend to your needs when you come for a visit, so you will have hotel personnel, cooks, entertainers, ferry captains, vendors, constables—pretty much everyone except the clowns. The clowns stay with me."

Qaqaq is overwhelmed at the thought of winning an island resort. The crowd is on its feet cheering the largesse. John Ratite holds up his hands in an attempt to coax one more pause in the revelry. When the crowd dies down Ratite says, "Okay, now, I don’t want this to get any more Willy Wonkaish than it has already become. Let me just say that Qaqaq is our champion and now he is also our host. John Ratite’s Custodia Islands Getaway is now over, but since the seaplanes won’t be here until tomorrow morning let’s make this closing night party one for the trivia books!"

John Ratite jumps into the crowd as the rhythms of the island percussion section resumes. Qaqaq removes a few of his victory garlands and joins the dancing pit. The visitors and islanders revel into the night while their minds, overheated with strategy and information recall, are cooled by the gentle tropical breezes lapping over the Nonspacific Ocean.

[T McAy]

Afternotes.



I used to shake my head in wonder at the thought of members of the Grey Labyrinth members being interested in a thread-based Mafia game that would take three months to complete. I have no business deriding such interests at this point.

For the most part, I made up this game as I went along. I didn’t know how many islands were going to be designed or how long the game was going to take. The getaway was as much an endurance challenge as it was a trivia challenge, and I wish I had found better ways to work with the visitors’ schedules. The visitors bore with me when it came to the pace of the game, the ambiguous rules and the controversial executive decisions and I am duly appreciative of that.

For anyone curious, my master copy of the game reports, in Microsoft Word, ended up 210 pages.

The Custodia Islands Getaway was essentially a parody of the TV show "Survivor." The tour groups mirrored the tribe system used on the CBS reality series. Of course, didn’t want the players to identify with unshaven, emaciated hut-builders on "Survivor." I wanted them to identify with that loud elevator couple on the hotels.com commercial.

The tour group names, "Lano-Catru" and "Ocagru" are anagrams of Aunt Carol and Cougar, who were among my favorite characters in the most recent season of the TV series "24."

The island names, as players probably noticed, were all strange combinations of words related to cleaning, words related to the island theme and stage-Italian suffixes. "Swepia" is a reference to the game show "Supermarket Sweep." The name Groons-Cape Owilia is a strained pronunciation of Groundskeeper Willie, the janitor who appears on "The Simpsons." The name Klinbresta is a nod to the 1970s version of "The Match Game," in which the word "breasts" was a popular answer. The Grey Labyrinth’s subject quizzes are known as "Anti-Match Games" in the National Puzzlers League, so I made a few Match Game jokes with names on that island. "St. Brestmore," in addition to the "breast" reference, is an anagram of Brett Somers, and "scholar Nelsen Yiller" becomes Charles Nelson Reilly.

The fictional news server "gl-postdispatch" and The Cardinal Store on Fedda Dusta were homages to my hometown of St. Louis.

If you don’t know the famous "Newlywed Game" response about the most unusual place that a contestant and her husband had made whoopee, just rent "Confessions of a Dangerous Mind," or watch one of those "Funniest Game Show Moments" specials that FOX airs every couple of weeks.

Geoff Edwards, before becoming a game show host, was a newspaper reporter in Dallas and witnessed the assassination of Lee Harvey Oswald in the Dallas Police Department.

I consider the 1970s-era "Tic Tac Dough" theme song to be the worst television theme song in history. This came up in a discussion a few years ago. Other nominees for the worst theme include the theme from "ChiPs" and the children’s "La La" version of the theme from "Rhoda."

The mention of Michael C. Fina in The Price is Right Mall is a reference to the lyrics of a song parody called "Nothing But Furniture." The parody was written by Scott Walker to be sung to the tune of a musical "sting" called "Splendido!" used on the The Price is Right. "Splendido!" is background music used for less extravagant showcases, i.e. ones without cars, boats or trips. You can hear the sting and read the lyrics at The ’80 TV Theme SuperSite (www.80stvthemes.com/).

I admit that the question about the swift at The Kwik-E-Mart on Groons was poorly written. I thought I had eliminated the "diving bird" ambiguity with the phrase "aptly named," but can see that I could have been clearer.

Takeru Kobayashi did successfully defend his hot dog eating title this year, but only ate 44 1/2 dogs so he didn’t beat his record.

Uppwitt People. Up with People. Okay you got it.

For more information on the real world ski resorts whose names were used for the villages on Scrubuppia go to www.goski.com.

All of the questions for the Klinbresta Library had already been written by the time I realized that very few players were going to make it on the ferry in Scrubuppia Harbor. I wanted at least six players to start in the library, which is why I chose to give an advantage to several players. If I hadn’t intervened, mole and Qaqaq probably would have just advanced to the finals which is coincidentally what happened anyway.

Female performers who sang the 1985 hit "We are the World" as part of the group U.S.A. for Africa who weren’t mentioned: Lindsey Buckingham, Kim Carnes, Sheila E., LaToya Jackson and Bette Midler.

Heads of state of the 12 most populous nations who were not mentioned: Hu Jintao (China), Abdul Kalam (India), Megawati Sukarnoputri (Indonesia), Luiz Inacio Lula da Silva (Brazil), Pervez Musharraf (Pakistan), Iajuuddin Ahmed (Bangladesh), Olusegun Obasanjo (Nigeria), Akihito (Japan), Vicente Fox Quesada (Mexico), Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo (The Philippines).

Impressionist painters not mentioned: Degas, Manet, Pissaro, Renoir, Sisley.

Monopoly movement tokens not mentioned: cannon, boat, horse and rider, shoe, iron, wheelbarrow. Pretty much all of the classic movement tokens would have been accepted. The "1998 popularity poll" part of the question served to deter players from answering with novelty movement tokens used in special editions of the game.

In Round 33, I strongly suspected that mole and Tahnan had figured out the floor plan of the library and were working together to trap the other players. If after passing through the Games and Food doors they doubled back with incorrect answers, everyone else would have been locked in the north wing. I guess I was wrong, or they changed their minds.

Excellent Endgame, players! I couldn’t have planned better drama as you pulled correct answers seemingly out of nowhere. You exhausted my queue of unused questions and I had to do some last minute writing in order to keep up with the demand. Last-minute writing is a challenge because I want to avoid writing content that I know one of the finalists is familiar with.

Those are all the notes I had. If there are other things you want to know about, ask away. Congratulations to all the players.

-- mod

[Qaqaq]

Frou-frou cocktails for EVERYBODY!

*Starts considering which of the male dancers are to act as, uh, personal masseurs.*

Mole, excellent job in the endgame. Tahnan, you did well for a weasel. *throws ice at Tahnan*

A hearty round of applause to T McAy/John Ratite for the best game I've ever played on the GL boards. A wide variety of questions, lots of original gimmicks throughout, superb moderation. He/they are welcome to stay and relax poolside as long as they like, as long as the clowns are safely locked away in a room somewhere.

And, in conclusion, now that this is over, you should all participate in the "English Language Quiz 3" thread. Hey, dancer ... another Cuba Libre over here, please ...